Day 1 with my 365 day trip around the sun. Some people wait for New Year's 🎉 but I do this annually on my birthday. I set the intention of what I would like to experience. It is such an empowering task. Most years, I would want to lose weight. Other years, run more marathons. Sometimes it was wild and crazy like travel more or learn more. This year a massive realization occurred. These are all things that live outside of me. This year, my journey is to love and respect who I am for what I am and what I do. Seems simple? (Ya, right!). What I realized was all the things that drive me crazy, I had to ask why it was driving me nuts 7 times to figure out the "WHY".
Well, from me asking myself all these questions, several things appeared.
1. I strived to please others. AKA Helping people.
2. I validated myself with others opinions. AKA Pleasing others.
3. I put everyone else ahead of my own needs, wants and desires. AKA Enabling others.
4. Doubting myself. AKA Validation from others.
5. Being too afraid to live big and following my dreams and desires. AKA Being afraid of being judged by others.
I sat down with my list above I realized one common theme. Never once did I listen to my heart and soul and I only listened to others, society and anyone and anything else. Was it not knowing how to trust myself or was it because I have never been taught to trust myself. I believe it was not being taught. Our habits are learned from our past. Next thing I had to dig deep into was what were the things I didn't trust, from my past, that has made me who I am today. Well, oh man, this list was massive. I do believe our parents and community are there to guide us and many time we are told what to believe. This is a very difficult and long process, which many people are afraid of exploring. I do not recommend doing this alone. This, my friends, is when many ugly fears will poke their head and scare the pants off you.
Over the past 5+ years, I have had many ups and downs, emotionally, mentally, and physically, and yet I would never classify myself as depressed and yet it was extremely dark. I love what Brene Brown says in her Netflix documentary "The Courage To Call". Brown said when you are growing emotionally and spiritually, be prepared for tons of up and down emotions. This is perfectly normal when personal growth occurs and it conflicts with your past belief system. Your mind is validating and trying to reset itself to become normal again. Your mind does not like something it doesn't know how to navigate. Once I heard Brown say this, a total sense of calm entered my heart and soul! (I am totally summarizing and interpreting it in my own way.).
Guess what....I am normal!
So here I am....1 day into my 55th trip around the sun! (Thanks Lois Unger for this interesting perspective!). I have long desired to help people by helping them holistically move better, do their sport better, live life actively, and to plain and simple feel better in life. Then I thought about my own personal life...🙄...#BOOM! Then it hit me!!!
I'm a fraud!!!
How can help people with this without doing this for myself! I was so busy giving this and not once did I stop and the thing about myself. Yes, I exercise, because I have to. Yes, I eat well, because I have to. Yes, I do self-care, because I have to. That's it!!!!! I want to help my clients and others and yet I "should" do it. Are you seeing what I am saying???? 😲. I need to WANT to help myself (positive tone) instead of I SHOULD do it (negative tone). You're probably thinking, ya Sheena, those are just words. Guess what, our mind can interpret it the way it always has without us knowing or any control. A simple change of my mindset has now opened my door!
I changed my actions, behavior, and words! - I exercise because I have to CHANGED TO I want to exercise! - I eat well because I have to CHANGED TO I want to eat well - I do self-care because I have to CHANGED TO I want to do self-care And any other thing I do for myself!
Today, I have started massive action to help my internal health. I read the book, Longevity Paradox written by Dr. Gundy, MD. Very interesting! So, why not experiment and give it a try. The plan is to do a 4-week reset plan where extreme discipline, planning, and purpose addresses inflammation and general health. It is 4 days of low carb vegan vegetarian (Kevin asked me to only call it vegetarian, which it is.) Nothing but veggies, nuts, and seeds. Then 2 days of eating regular vegetarian. Then one day of fasted regular vegetarian. The is repeated 4 weeks before any animal proteins are reintroduced back into your diet if we want it at all. There is nothing processed and everything is home cooked, whole food, organic (if possible), fresh grown and local (if possible).
Here we go.....day 1 of 365 days because I AM and not I should. I challenge you to internally look at your language. How many times do you catch yourself saying the SHOULD word? When you hear it, replace it with you will or you won't. No wishy-washy! Yes or no! Stop guilting yourself and start living a better life!
See you on Day 2!
#Anti "SHOULD" movement🌞
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